Today is like wading through treacle. Well that’s how it feels. Everything is on go slow like a bad film playing out in front of me. Even lifting my head hurts …..I just want to cry.
Anything and everything you suggest will be met with disdain, I want to shout, scream, cry, smash things up all at the same time. I just feel plain irritable over nothing in particular. It’s times like this I debate whether going back on my medication will be helpful? I feel very contrary and awkward and just plain NO!!!
But ……...what about the flip side?
You see not all days or weeks are like this, sometimes I feel exhilarated full of life as if every cell in my body is bouncing off the walls. I just need to tap into that and find that feeling…except I can’t, I can’t even find anything nice to say about that. God you’ve heard it all before I sound like a miserable cow ...Yeah and stop coming up with ideas on how I can get out of this one ...because really I’m plotting ways to kill you right now.
I just feel plain irritable and there is nothing you can do ...I feel really lonely, unable to ask or reach out , I have a lot of chatter going on in my head telling me all the things I don’t really need to hear , things that won’t help.
So in short, I know how you feel, I am feeling those things right now, whose with me? shout “ME TOO”. So even if you don’t wanna hear this right now , here is a list of 10 ….”SCRAP THAT” ...I can only find 5 things I know will help. Maybe not this second but they may earworm in and make a difference later on.
- It’s OK (take a deep breathe RIGHT NOW that’s an order btw) - so you feel a bit irritable - that’s completely fine, ride that irritability, feel every part of it let it happen. It’s completely fine to feel this, it won’t last forever and let's see what it’s trying to tell you? Close your eyes, feel the irritable feeling, now ask it a question - “what do you want”? “Why are you here today”? See what answers it brings.
- Take a day off - go do all those little jobs, washing, ironing, tidying the book shelves, alphabetize the CDs (do people still have cds?) all those meaningless (essential parts of daily life) actually have a purpose, feel accomplished when done, go do them! Hint hint my most favourite non essential thing to do when I feel really pants - tidy and organise the knickers. drawer (get it???feeling pants so tidy those pants!)
- Do nothing!!! Yep you heard right and I repeat just in case you wondering what the fuck I’m on about DO NOTHING!!! Yeap sometimes the best course of action to feeling this way is nothing. You see even saying that out loud I instantly feel better - I feel better than all the suggestions of doing something, I feel lighter in my head already and it requires nothing, no action at all, (nothing works for a few days but if you have been doing nothing for weeks, months, years I suggest a different course of action - please reach out now!) You see I’m no longer fighting with myself having a silly argument. I am happy and I am justified so you know what! Go do it, veg out take a load off now! - If you want read our previous blog on 3 Reasons Procrastination is Brilliant
- Small and bitesize is your friend. Yep I get it the big picture is scary, life feels like a fucking huge enormous task that right now you just can’t and don’t want to do. I know, I feel ya! So let's go bitesize , tiny morsels of life that you can manage, I know you can do just a weeny thing. So that first weeny thing to do is, Take a deep breath, feel that breath enter your lungs feel like you are exhaling all the hard stuff the weight within you and start to feel lighter. There is wasn’t that hard was it? (let me know if it was below I’d love to hear.
- Tidy that desk, your room and clear the clutter of all the things staring at you right now, because nothing has to be done! To be clear nothing is that important that it can’t wait a day or two. There was a day that I actually didn't take the child to school and there were several that we arrived late and you know what…….. NOTHING HAPPENED…….. no ground opened up and I certainly wasn’t struck down. Everything will be fine just ease up on YOU right now because you are AWESOME! And you actually have a lot to offer , but right now if you don’t want to, that’s cool , just remember that you are a pretty damn fine human, even if you don’t feel like one right now. Having that duvet day may just save you, go do it now!
- You probably don’t wanna hear this …………...so i’ll shut up now
- Really shut up now because I’m boring you………..
- Yeah that’s just a silly thing to say…………..
- Please shut up now…………..
So you see my friend, I started out saying I had to give you 10 things to save you from YOU and I couldn’t think of anything worth saying, I felt annoyed that I couldn’t give you a great chunk of my mind of useful stuff because I’ve been there and the truth is the best thing I have done is nothing, because after that little rest, that moment of self care and love. I have come back fighting with the best ideas and a great wealth of wisdom for me from ME and you too can do the same . Try me let me know your best wisdom for YOU ‘cos maybe i’ll stop being contrary just for a minute and take your advice , Love Roo Betty x